Hey.

I feel terrible now. But i will be fine at the end of this entry. I promise.

I still remember how we met, and how the flirting game began. I remember clearly, the hotel we spent our first night together. I remember eating saugages and telling you dirty jokes. I remember walking down the street of german towns as if we have known each other for very long. I remember telling you i wanna settle down for good. I remember how we will go out for a walk and your friends started digging out for the latest information from you. I remember you helping me wear my bow tie. I remember we hugged to sleep, I remember back in singapore, we had our first sushi meal. I remember it was an awkward meal and i was trying to create some cheesy conversation. I remember. I remember a lot.

I remember, of malaysia. I remember how we talk about managing a family. I remember we promised a pet dog. We promised a beautiful koi pond too. We promise a studio with grand piano in the house too.

I remember practicing with you. I remember making love with you. I remember your innocent look when you got teased. I remember moving house for you. I remember your cries. I remember laughters. I remember our big dreams. I remember shopping together. I remember your red bull and banana for my recital. I remember you sat through it and gave me your full support. I remember your cute expression when your hair is messy. I remember the nights we sleep together and ended kicking each other towards the morning. I remember how our breath stinks when we wake up in the morning.

I remember you coming to my rescue whenever i need help. I remember no matter how hard we fought or quarrelled, you will still help me silently. I remember your most attentive side, always looking into the details. I remember how we always have disagreement when we talk about music but always shrug at the end of the day. I remember how we hunt down for cheap food when we were both broke. I remember you gave me the most lovable love i could ever have in my entire life so far.

I remember too, the way you will say you love me. And also, our code for saying 'i love you'.

That is all that i wanna recall, should i read this again 10 or 20 years down the road. I will remember you as someone i once loved, and someone who loved me greatly. We were happy without worries.

From on, i will move on. And no matter how hard it, i will get through this. We will forget each other and even if we do meet, we will not know each other. This is the best for me and you. If there's fate, we will still see each other, many years later. And if we really do, i would like to see the same expression you have when you have messy hair, or the very shy and awkward smile.

Till then, please take care. See a doctor when you are ill, drink more water when the weather gets harsh and dont overwork yourself no matter how many deadlines are there for the journals and essays. I will take care of myself. Dont worry. I will keep myself healthy.

tomorrow-is-a-new-day-ly yours
Hughes